It can be frustrating when someone in your life continually insists that they are right – even when they are wrong. In our personal lives, we can be creative in our approach to handling this, but when a leader’s desire to show their intellect drives their desire to always be right – things cango wrong!
Some leaders associate ‘being right’ with being the most valuable in the team, but more experienced leaders with strong emotional intelligence understand that an obsession with winning every discussion will damage their leadership brand. When this happens, employees quickly lose respect resulting in disastrous consequences such as low engagement, reduced productivity and high turnover.
Savvy leaders acknowledge that the desire to always be right interferes with the ability to build an innovative, empowered and collaborative team as employees learn to accept that the leader will use their perceived ‘power’ to have the last say. A leader’s ability to have the strength to rise above the desire to ‘be right’ and embrace ‘being wrong’ will stand them apart.
The following are some tips on the right way to be wrong:
It is tempting to throw active listening out the window and start thinking about how you will ‘win’ a discussion when the other person is still talking. It is natural to want to be right and defend your point of view, but it is dangerous to jump straight into a defensive mindset without truly considering the other person’s perspective. Take a breath and reframe your thinking to the possibility that perhaps the ‘right outcome’ may be reached by seeing the other person as a teammate and not an opponent.
Sure, it may not seem ideal to have the first year apprentice highlight a solution to a long serving issue, but rather than focusing on the need to be smarter or more competent – reframe your thinking to see the positives of having such a broad thinking apprentice who is willing to share their ideas. Don’t let your ego get in the way of building a team culture where employees have the space to add direct value to the business.
Being a leader is much less about being the smartest person in the room and much more about how to engage, motivate and lead a room full of smart and capable employees. Leaders are not always right and it is important that they take a moment to consider the accuracy of their statements before jumping feet first into a debate about who is right.
Sometimes leaders fall into the trap of believing their experience or years of service leads them to the position that they are right. The special thing about experience is that everyone brings their own knowledge, insights and ideas to the table even if they have only been in your organisation for five minutes. Don’t confuse years of service with always being right. It is no longer 1996, and whilst your idea may have been perfect back then, every day new solutions are solving old problems.
Before jumping into a conversation ready to be right, consider how much more beneficial it would be for the team if you were more interested in the right solution – even if that came from someone else. Be open to the possibility of someone else solving the problem and consider the benefits of learning from this new perspective or idea.
When was the last time you genuinely asked for someone else’s opinion on a problem that needed to be solved? Was that opinion only from a peer or leader or did you put aside your ego and ask your direct reports? There is something really empowering about saying, “I don’t know the solution to this problem. I would love to hear your insights”. This technique works to demonstrate that the leader is not always right and they value an empowered and collaborative team.
Are you pointing out that someone is wrong for the right reasons – or to demonstrate your knowledge? We are all wrong some of the time and it does not serve a respectful relationship well to make a habit of pointing out other people’s mistakes. If there is a genuine learning opportunity, the feedback may be warranted – but before jumping into the ‘you were wrong’ speech consider your motivation.
Some leaders will avoid owning their mistakes at all costs, but there is something really empowering about saying, “I was wrong about that decision”. It demonstrates to team members that this is an environment where it is ok to be wrong and most importantly shows them that leaders are human and ‘being wrong’ is sometimes the only way to get to the right outcome.
It is a hard pill to swallow, but it is definitely worth having the strength of character to admit when you are wrong. For example, “Mark, I know I had strong views in the meeting this morning about the sales forecast. I have since reviewed the reports and it appears my calculations were incorrect. I apologise for pushing that point and I can now definitely see your perspective more clearly”.
It may not feel like it - but being wrong can be a gift and the first step towards being right. We gain the best learning opportunities from our mistakes and from being vulnerable and brave enough to admit when we are wrong. Our quest to always be right prevents our ability to demonstrate the true meaning of leadership and limits our capacityto empower and engage with the diversity of thought within our teams.
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Georgina is Senior HR Content Editor – Publications at Ai Group. She is an accomplished Human Resource professional with over 25 years of generalist and leadership experience in a broad range of industries including financial services, tourism, travel, government and agriculture. She has successfully advised and partnered with senior leaders to implement people and performance initiatives that align to business strategy. Georgina is committed to utilising her experience to create resources that educate and engage and is passionate about supporting members to optimise an inclusive workforce culture that drives performance.
